Girls Are More Obsessed With Sex Than Boys Are

Generalisations and conclusions based on nothing but observations… This is going to be fun!

As you might know already, I am not very positive about current “popular feminism”. It has a lot of flaws, which is what always happens when something becomes the norm, and one of them is especially evident when you spend some time on Twitter.

Twitter is, to say it nicely, infested with Beliebers, Directioners and whatever other kind of fandom you can think of. I will take these two fandoms as the prime example, as they are very typical for this situation. Without needing to do any research, we can quickly conclude that the majority of people in these fandoms are teenage girls, and that finding a male specimen in these groups is going to be rather difficult.

Now, what I want to use as my example for explaining the title of this post is the kind of things these Beliebers and Directioners talk about and the things they do. Of course, we are talking about generalisations here, and what I will say about Directioners in general will go for the majority, or at the very least for the most vocal part. It doesn’t go for every individual, as there are plenty of these fans who have very different interests.

However, if we do have to come to one general interest Beliebers and Directioners have in common, it would be sex. And a lot of it too. The tweets and fanfics that are being written range from disturbing to gross to absolutely-disgusting-please-seek-help-because-I-think-you-just-killed-me-with-your-oversexed-mind. Yeah… and then imagine that a large part of that fandom is under 15.

Fortunately, today is not the day I will talk about how bad this is. What I do want to talk about, however, is the reason why so many of these girls involved in such fandoms end up writing and talking about such disturbing things. Particularly, a question I asked myself is “Why do boys/guys not obsess over female celebrities as much as girls do?”

The answer to that can be summarised in one word: feminism. It is not acceptable for a guy to make the kind of comments these fangirls are making. If a guy, or actually anyone, would write a fanfic about how they would, in the greatest details, have sex with a female celebrity, it would immediately be labelled as sexist. This person would be despised by everyone, because objectifying women like that is sexist and should not be allowed. And that’s where the difference is: society doesn’t disapprove of objectifying men.

And that’s wrong. Not because it’s unfair to men, because that’s not the issue. I’m not suggesting that we should start objectifying women so that everything will be fair again, but if it is unacceptable to write sexual fanfics about women, then it should also be unacceptable to do the same about men.

That is what should be changed. It should become just as strange and disturbing for a 12-year-old girl to describe her sexual fantasies with Justin Bieber as it is for an 18-year-old guy to describe his sexual fantasies with Emma Watson. That is what equality is, and if that isn’t enough, then just think about how many oversexed 15 year-olds we’d be able to get rid of. They would be able to find different hobbies, and the world would be rid of millions of disturbing fanfics, all in the name of equality. Sounds good, doesn’t it?


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More on this topic from Dean Richards:

Feminism is Losing its Touch

Sexism and the Meaning of the Mysterious Evil Called “Society”

White Students Accuse Black Teacher of Racism: Lies, Bias and Bad Media


About Dean Richards

A young student with a passion for writing. Aspiring author and human rights activist, but I write about anything. "If you don't like how things are, change it! You're not a tree!" New blog post every Monday!
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13 Responses to Girls Are More Obsessed With Sex Than Boys Are

  1. internetfeminism says:

    I’m pretty sure the majority of people out there -do- think it’s creepy that preteens are writing sexual fantasies about Justin Bieber.

    I have no problem with males or females of any age expressing their sexuality. Most people wouldn’t publish these kinds of stories about someone they know personally though. I think the issue is not feminism or sexism, but learning to treat celebrities as real people with feelings and integrity. And there is enough objectification of Emma Watson and Alison Brie and Christina Hendricks to know that this is a problem on both sides of the gender fence.

  2. Well, creepy, yes. But if female celebrities were treated the way One Direction and Justin Bieber are, feminists would start a riot, while now, it is basically “frowned upon”, but nobody truly takes any action. There are hardly any blog posts wasted on it, so it doesn’t get as much attention as it would have if it had been the other way around.

    You are right about the celebrity part, though. It wouldn’t happen as much to real people, and it is indeed celebrities who are being objectified. Still, although Emma Watson does occasionally get objectified, it is clearly a whole lot less than artists like Justin Bieber and One Direction. Then again, it is an unfair comparison, because Emma has a very different character. If you were to compare 1D and JB to for example Beyonce, you might end up seeing a lot more similarities.

    I do want to add that in my opinion. these artists for the greatest part do it to themselves. Especially Beyonce and Justin Bieber don’t seem to care much if they reveal a few body parts, and although it shouldn’t, that does quickly lead to very disturbing thoughts in young teenagers.

    Again though, you don’t see written porn popping up about Beyonce, so I will stick to what I said in the post itself.

  3. mbman says:

    Justin Bieber seems to attract the craziest from both sides of the spectrum (the “Love” and the “Hate” sides).

    One can see why, his people know that sex sells. And Justin sells it very well, even I will admit lol. But such a profile, also sets you up for creeps from both sides of the spectrum.

    On one side, you have the 12 year old’s, with there fantasies. On the other, you have the jealous (?) “non-fans” that hate him to the point of, at times, making attempts on his life. The “love” side is understandable, its the other that I find baffling. Even, some of the things ive heard people say, the rumors.

    Like, a former co-worker said Bieber was going to jail, because he raped a minor and got her pregnant. As far as I know it wasn’t true. And even if so, I would HIGHLY doubt it was rape (what fan wouldn’t let him “in” lol).

    • Yeah, you do have a good point… Plotting murder is definitely a step worse than writing creepy fanfics…

      Still, the rumours most likely have quite some truth to them. At one point, there was a new story about him every day, and it could hardly be that they had all been made up. The guy became famous when he had hardly even reached puberty yet, and that is having its effects now. He doesn’t know what it is like to be a normal person, and it has made him incredibly arrogant. Just think of what he wrote in the Anne Frank guestbook or how often he neglects his responsibilities.

      In the example you mention, the term “rape” is made up, and people shouldn’t do that. However, there really is a girl who claims that her baby is Justin’s, and she really was underage back then. As we have recently seen in another case, that sort of actions can lead to severe penalties such as having to be registered as a sex-offender, and sometimes even making them end up in jail.

      In short, maybe not everything about Justin Bieber is true, but he has definitely lost his mind due to all the fame, and eventually, he will end up in jail.

      • mbman says:

        I didn’t hear anything about his writing in the Ann Frank guest book, nor about this pregnancy, but I guess we will see.

        Another question would be, if the girl lied about age. Would that make a difference? Then again, im guessing, no.

        You know who the court is going to listen to anyway, if I know how these things usually go.

      • It depends on the country, unfortunately. There was a US case in the news a while ago in which a just-18-year-old had had sex with her 15 year old girlfriend just after she turned 18, and she was prosecuted and is now facing serious charges. People like that are being judged in the same way as when a 60 year old man has sex with a 12 year old, and the same would happen to Justin Bieber (although it would depend on the country/state he was judged in).

      • Austin says:

        Funny… He’s now in jail!

  4. Nada says:

    But that doesn’t mean that girls are more obssesed about sex than boys, they are just more , not brave but a word like it with a negative meaning.
    I mean just because they don’t publish it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist !

  5. Kate says:

    This is interesting to me because I never thought that the proportion of people obsessed with sex was different among girls and boys (I’m only concerning myself with the people on content aggregator Internet cultures, e.g. reddit, tumblr, and twitter).

    I think that the main difference between genders is how it is expressed. Apart from the puke-inducing idolisation of Jennifer Lawrence on reddit, it’s more culturally acceptable for boys to express their ‘obsession with sex’ through porn (I’m using /r/gonewild’s popularity as a source here).

    This is less acceptable for girls, but suddenly it has become culturally acceptable for girls to be obsessed with a few select celebrities, whether they be Justin Bieber or Benedict Cumberbatch. I would say that this results in extreme obsessions, which results in slashfics.

    Also I can’t really back this up, but I’ve hear that males are generally more visual, while females prefer words, so that would contribute.

    • You’re probably right actually, about the fact that it isn’t a natural difference. Most likely, men and women just have the tendency to be obsessed with sex equally, but in the end, it is society which makes sure that differences start developing.

      Before, it was acceptable for men to talk about sex, but for women, it was a big taboo. Fortunately, that has changed now, and feminism has made sure that if men talk about the looks of a girl/woman in a certain way, they will be reprimanded (which I personally find, to a certain limit which is sometimes crossed, a good thing).

      The problem is just that it has gone a bit wrong. Just recently I was watching a YouTube cover by Chrissy Costanza, who, aside from being a great singer also happens to be incredibly beautiful. One of the (male) commenters pointed this out in a very mild and complimentary way, but his comment was soon brought down by a few other people who felt like he should focus on her singing rather than her looks.

      The difference right now is that the other way around, that doesn’t happen. Girls can be obsessive over Justin Bieber’s looks without getting comments about it, and that leads them to be much more free in their thoughts and comments, which also leads them to be more “obsessed with sex”, or at least it is more visible than with men.

      And about your last comment: that does sound quite interesting. I’ll have a look into that to see if the internet has any evidence for it.

      • Jayne says:

        That last one definitely has some weight. When I was finding myself -cough- a few years ago with the help of the Internet, most visual stuff was obviously aimed at men, whilst there’re erotica sites with a lot more stories written by females for females, or even written by males for females, which is kinda cool.

        I like what you have to say for the most part, from the posts I’ve read of yours tonight. I don’t quite agree with everything, but it’s a nice stance you’ve got going on when it comes to society. I think I’ll be keeping an eye on your writing from now on.

      • Yeah, that is definitely a good point. After all, Fifty Shades of Grey became extremely popular with women, while an equivalent for men doesn’t really exist. There’s just no demand for it.

        And thank you for the nice words! I’d almost say I’m glad you don’t agree with everything I say, because that would just be boring and a bit useless. Also, I’m not sure if I always agree with myself… 😛

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