After all the serious posts lately, I figured I’d go for something light today. Now, as you might know, I’m quite a big supporter of understanding and learning from other people’s cultures, so I figured it might be interesting to have a closer look into the typical characteristics of people in different countries around the world. And of course, there’s no better way to do that than to use Google!
There are currently 197 countries in the world (which includes more recent and controversial countries such as Kosovo and Palestine), and Google has something to say about almost all of them. To find out the true basics of each nation, I chose to Google “why are…” followed by the name of the inhabitants of whatever country I was searching for. A more scientific research method does not exist!
So here goes, in a rather random order starting with Asia:
First of all, according to Google, the Chinese are rude, loud, skinny and… well… yellow… (which just makes me wonder if I’ve properly understood the idea of the colour yellow). Vietnamese, on the other hand, are mean, short and ghetto aside from being rude, and Indians are rich, smelly and vegetarians. Also, people wondered why they are called Indians (although I’m guessing they were talking about other Indians).
However, Google is also positive about a few Asian countries! For example, the Bhutanese are happy, the Indonesians are pretty, the Koreans are (obviously) good at gaming and the Japanese are nice (and weird, but I’ll just see that as a compliment).
Moving on to Africa, apparently, Ghanaians are black (such a surprise!) They are also happy, short and… well… dark… But we already covered that. You’d think the same would go for all African countries then, but no! Apparently Ghanaians are particularly black, while for example Nigerians are rude, arrogant and scamming (it’s fair to say that Google doesn’t particularly like Nigeria).
At the same time, Google finds Somalis ugly, and if we move to the other side of Africa, we will find that the Moroccans are also ugly, in addition to being white and gay. I am starting to wonder who googled all these things, though…
As it appears, Google is not much friendlier about Europe: the French are so rude it is suggested twice, the Belgians are boring (although as a Dutch person, I have to admit it’s disappointing that their intelligence wasn’t mentioned…), the Norwegians are rich (which we’ll take as an insult) and the Swiss are all three of those combined.
Then again, there are some countries which would make a good holiday destination: the Germans are organised and smart (and, unfortunately, extremely good at penalties…), Serbians are beautiful and tall, Ukrainians are hot and Latvians are beautiful and funny. Oh… and the Portuguese… they appear to be both white and dark… I’m starting to think Google isn’t the most reliable source of information…
But there’s also plenty to find in the Americas! For example, Canadians are nice and weird (which again, I’ll take as a compliment), people from the US are stupid, obese, ignorant and rude (Ouch!), and the Mexicans are short, lazy and hot, although perhaps “hot” could mean something else than it did for the Ukrainians.
In the meantime, Cubans are illegal, black and… well… white… (you were doing so well on those Americans, Google… how disappointing!). Costa Ricans are apparently the happiest people in the world, Haitians are mean and Nicaraguans seem to have nothing but good cigars.
Finally, in South America, we can find pretty Brazilians who are good at football, Argentineans who are rude, white and arrogant, Ecuadorians who are short and ugly and Peruvians who are apparently not from South America at all: they are Asian. Well, they do say you learn something new every day!
Before I end this post, just a couple more of my favourites: Arabians are not just rich, but they are so rich that in the four suggestions Google gave, their wealth was mentioned all four times in slightly different ways. Additionally, the Jordanians have gotten lost and accidentally ended up in Haiti, the Russians are bad drivers, Swedish fish are Swedish (whoever Googled that…) and the Austrians… well… they are just wrong. Nothing else: just wrong.
So that basically sums up the world! I hope you’ve all learned a lot from this, because naturally, this is basic knowledge everyone should have. And if you were insulted by anything written above…? Well… Google doesn’t lie, right?
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